Sex, tears and books thrown in anger.

Ahh book club, how you force me to feel all the feelings.I  have yet to write a blog post about all of the reading that  been done, and so, as I sit here all alone in the dark (not really dark, more like twilight) (shit wait, did you notice how the word twilight has been ruined by Twilight?).

As I sit here alone, (enveloped  by the silence and pale ebb of the sun), watching Dread, I figured I would distract myself from the scary B rated horror by finally reviewing my books. Huzzah!

Starting with the Sexy times!

Darkfever, written by Karen Moning. The first month of Open Genre book club was Romance. I will admit that although I do not read them often, this was not my first venture into the dreaded Romance section of the bookstore.

While shopping, I didn’t have anything in particular in mind. I know I didn’t want vampires, or warewolves, or cat people, or aliens, or old-timey bosoms and bloomers. This left me with Fairies…

The story revolves around Mackayla Lane (or Mac). She is pretty and blond and is loving life, that is until her sister is murdered over in Ireland, and she is thrust (hehehe) into mysterious, devious, sexy world of Fae!

Within the book (and who am I kidding, series…sigh) there are two main male leads who frustratingly vie for Mac’s affections: Barrons the mysterious, animalistic raw bookstore owner, and V’lane, the death-by-sex Fae Prince (he can kill you with all his sweet sweet loving).

So, I got myself a little wrapped up in this series. Despite the cliches, and the STUPID STUPID LANGUAGE (lets all give cute, annoying nicknames to our deadly weapons) and the LACK OF SEXYness, I still managed to read 4/5 books, and do plan on reading the 5th. The premise is interesting (the fabric that seperates Fae and Human worlds is tearing), and the sexual tension is just enough to keep you wanting more (Because NOTHING SEXY happens other than Mac being so super turned on that she strips in public, but thats about the worst of it!).

It’s a romance novel, it was light and easy, with not much actual romance (no smoopy).

I give this book 3 heaving bosoms out of 5.

2nd up, Mass Murder, helplessness and tears.

Last months topic for book club was historical fiction. I’ve had The Book Thief by Markus Zusak on my shelf for some time, but have never cracked it open.

The story is about a foster girl, named Leisel, and the people surrounding her during the holocaust. These people, such as her foster parents (Hans and Rosa), her best friend (Rudy), the mayors wife, and the hidden Jew (Max)  weave a fabric of hope and love among the ashes of hate and despair.

The story is narrated by Death, during one of his (obviously) busiest times. He narrates as a helpless observer to destruction, and holds a special curiosity about the book thief (Leisel).

I will admit, it took me a long time to read this book. Not because I lack skills in the reading area, but because it is a book about the holocaust, and so you know how it is going to end, so you never really want to get to that point.

However, it got to that point.

The book provides a roller coster of emotions. You will fall in love with the characters, laugh with them,  taste the dreadful pea soup with them, fight imaginary hitlers with them, and then they will rip you apart until the words are replaced with the salt of your tears.

I give this book 4.5 stolen books out of 5.

3rd book of note: A Crushing Disappointment 

This months book club genre was Teen-lit, so I chose Bumped by Megan McCafferty. I was so FREAKING excited to read this. I love Megan McCafferty’s other books, and have read a few of the books in her Jessica Darling series, so I assumed that this book would also be awesome.

The premise of the book is that a virus has hit, and 80-90% of the populations will become sterile sometime between the ages of 18-20, which means that by the time that people start settling down and wanting a family, they are unable to. This has let to a market for teens to become surrogates.  (I know, it sounds awesome, please keep reading). There are different levels of surrogates…there are the amateurs, (who just go get knocked up by their boyfriends, or attend orgys, and then the baby is auctioned off after birth and after some genetic ratings are done) and then there are pros, (who are teens who are chosen to be surrogates and who are paired with a specific partner to create a child for a couple.) In order to facilitate this process, society has become obsessed with teen pregnancy. Young girls can buy fake belly’s to walk around in (the style), the pop music is all about getting preg, in addition our pregged up teens are fed all sorts of pills so they disconnect from the life that they have grown, and are completely oblivious to the birthing process (won’t/don’t remember anything). Also, girls who preg are given HUGE amounts of cash and prizes, college tuition, cars, tummy tucks, it’s a great thing to do.

The book has two main characters. They are twin sisters, separated at birth. One is a pro, and one is a religious fanatic who lives in a religious commune, who decides to visit her pro sister. Their names are Melody and Harmony, but I have no idea which is which. The characters are so fucking flat. They have no personality at all. Also, the story is lacking a plot (some would say one of the most important things in a book). It does move and transition…but the movement is RIDICULOUS, seriously. One day (lets call it Tuesday) the religious twin is so conservative that she won’t even shake the hand of a boy (despite her gloves!) but then the VERY NEXT DAY (seriously, Wednesday) she fucks a pro because he looks likes Jesus and convinces her that he can make her feel God through his awesome sexual prowess.

AAARRRGGG!

AAAARRRGGG!!!

I have never not read a sequel to a book, no matter how shitty I usually have the urge to have the story continued. NOT THIS TIME..

This book has so much potential. The author knows how to write. I know this for a fact. The premise is AWESOME, but yet the two do not come together.

I got so frustrated about this book, that it impacted my ability to read other books, because I am obsessed which the potential. I solved this by writing and brainstorming how I would change the story

Mappin’

Of course, I changed major plot points (and gave it one! hurray) and the characters names….and turned it into something completely different all together. You never know, maybe one day I will spin a story or a book out of this debacle. Nevertheless, I can now stop obsessing over the potential, and start focussing on my new book (The Maze Runner, by James Dashner.)

At the end of the day, I give Bumped 1 belly bump out of 5.

Later days!

PS. I haven’t put up any links on this page, as for some reason I’m unable to at this point in time, I will come back and fix that.

 

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